Giant Space Lizard! http://giantspacelizard.com Sat, 04 Feb 2012 05:00:02 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.5.1 en Colonial Squash Hastily Drawn Stream of Consciousness - The Wild Once - Page 06 http://giantspacelizard.com/2012/02/04/colonial-squash-hastily-drawn-stream-of-consciousness-the-wild-once-page-06/ http://giantspacelizard.com/2012/02/04/colonial-squash-hastily-drawn-stream-of-consciousness-the-wild-once-page-06/#comments Sat, 04 Feb 2012 05:00:02 +0000 Thompkins http://giantspacelizard.com/?p=215

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]]> http://giantspacelizard.com/2012/02/04/colonial-squash-hastily-drawn-stream-of-consciousness-the-wild-once-page-06/feed/ Colonial Squash Hastily Drawn Stream of Consciousness - The Wild Once - Page 05 http://giantspacelizard.com/2012/02/02/colonial-squash-the-wild-once-page-05/ http://giantspacelizard.com/2012/02/02/colonial-squash-the-wild-once-page-05/#comments Thu, 02 Feb 2012 05:00:47 +0000 Thompkins http://giantspacelizard.com/?p=214

Title: Into COLONIAL SQUASH!  Granted all of the powers and none of the responsibilities of our nation’s founding fathers! [[Colonial Squash [...]]]>

Title: Into COLONIAL SQUASH!  Granted all of the powers and none of the responsibilities of our nation’s founding fathers!

[[Colonial Squash stands triumphantly under Caesar Rodney, James Smith and some other founding father whose name has been lost.]]

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Title: Benjamin Nathanial Washington heroically leaves work and drives to a nearby lake [[Ben leaves his car carrying the bag of [...]]]>

Title: Benjamin Nathanial Washington heroically leaves work and drives to a nearby lake

[[Ben leaves his car carrying the bag of green tea.]]

Title: By throwing the tea bag into the water, re-enacting that act of patriotism…he is transformed…

[[Ben throws the green tea into the water.]]

]]> http://giantspacelizard.com/2012/01/28/colonial-squash-the-wild-once-page-04/feed/ Colonial Squash Hastily Drawn Stream of Consciousness - The Wild Once - Page 03 http://giantspacelizard.com/2012/01/26/colonial-squash-the-wild-once-page-03/ http://giantspacelizard.com/2012/01/26/colonial-squash-the-wild-once-page-03/#comments Thu, 26 Jan 2012 05:00:24 +0000 Thompkins http://giantspacelizard.com/?p=212

Phone: RING RING [[Ben, who was leaning over to get toys to give to the child, reaches for the phone but [...]]]>

Phone: RING RING

[[Ben, who was leaning over to get toys to give to the child, reaches for the phone but it is grabbed by Laur.]]

Ben: I’ll ge-

Laur: Hello?  What?  The Chair of the City Council?  Do you want to make a reservation or…he hung up.

Ben: Uh, my shift’s over.  I’m going to take some of this green tea.  I already wrote it.  See you tomorrow, Laur.

]]> http://giantspacelizard.com/2012/01/26/colonial-squash-the-wild-once-page-03/feed/ Colonial Squash Hastily Drawn Stream of Consciousness - The Wild Once - Page 02 http://giantspacelizard.com/2012/01/21/colonial-squash-the-wild-once-page-02/ http://giantspacelizard.com/2012/01/21/colonial-squash-the-wild-once-page-02/#comments Sat, 21 Jan 2012 05:00:50 +0000 Thompkins http://giantspacelizard.com/?p=211

Mother: Don’t hand him more crap I don’t have enough time to go to the register before our friends get [...]]]>

Mother: Don’t hand him more crap I don’t have enough time to go to the register before our friends get here!

Ben: On the contrary - we can add any gift shop purchases to your dinner bill, ma’am

[[Ben is handing the child a stuffed giraffe.]]

[[The child runs into the dining area.]]

Mother: Kevin, wait!

Ben: That’ll be $37.95 plus tax ma’am

]]> http://giantspacelizard.com/2012/01/21/colonial-squash-the-wild-once-page-02/feed/ Colonial Squash Hastily Drawn Stream of Consciousness - The Wild Once - Page 01 http://giantspacelizard.com/2012/01/19/colonial-squash-the-wild-once-page-01/ http://giantspacelizard.com/2012/01/19/colonial-squash-the-wild-once-page-01/#comments Thu, 19 Jan 2012 05:00:26 +0000 Thompkins http://giantspacelizard.com/?p=210

Title: At a “Honkey Barrel” restaurant in Apple Valley, MN mild-mannered Benjamin Nathanial Washington helps customers [[Ben watches a female customer [...]]]>

Title: At a “Honkey Barrel” restaurant in Apple Valley, MN mild-mannered Benjamin Nathanial Washington helps customers

[[Ben watches a female customer and her child looking at toys in the gift shop.]]

Ben (thoughts): If I can get 2 more toys in that kid’s hands his mom will have to buy him at least one

Ben: Did you see this?

[[Ben shows the child a pop gun from the gift shop.]]

Off-panel: HEY!

]]> http://giantspacelizard.com/2012/01/19/colonial-squash-the-wild-once-page-01/feed/ Colonial Squash Hastily Drawn Stream of Consciousness - The Wild Once - Cover http://giantspacelizard.com/2012/01/14/colonial-squash-the-wild-once-cover/ http://giantspacelizard.com/2012/01/14/colonial-squash-the-wild-once-cover/#comments Sat, 14 Jan 2012 05:00:58 +0000 Thompkins http://giantspacelizard.com/?p=209

Title: Colonial SQUASH in THE WILD ONCE Colonial Squash: NOOOO! [[Colonial Squash yells as a car drives off a cliff.]] ]]>

Title: Colonial SQUASH in THE WILD ONCE

Colonial Squash: NOOOO!

[[Colonial Squash yells as a car drives off a cliff.]]

]]> http://giantspacelizard.com/2012/01/14/colonial-squash-the-wild-once-cover/feed/ Hiatus time yet again http://giantspacelizard.com/2011/12/17/hiatus-time-yet-again/ http://giantspacelizard.com/2011/12/17/hiatus-time-yet-again/#comments Sat, 17 Dec 2011 05:00:51 +0000 Thompkins http://giantspacelizard.com/?p=208 I’m going to avoid posting new comics until January 14th.  This should give me time to color Archbishop Triceratops and get a head start on new projects.  Check back every now and then and all of the A.B.T. comics will eventually be colored.  The new projects I mentioned…are not going to be what’s posted on the 14th.  What will post on the 14th is another hastily drawn, stream of consciousness webcomic.  Everyone loved the last one, right?  RIGHT?  Fine, but it’s that or nothing.  Chaerb has not been doing any writing as far as I know, so I’m going to be on my own for writing the next few (or all) series posted here.  I might consider opening up the site to guest authors, if this sounds interesting you can get in touch with me via the contact info or the comment form below.

]]> http://giantspacelizard.com/2011/12/17/hiatus-time-yet-again/feed/ Archbishop Triceratops - The Paleocene Creed - Page 10 http://giantspacelizard.com/2011/12/10/archbishop-triceratops-the-paleocene-creed-page-10/ http://giantspacelizard.com/2011/12/10/archbishop-triceratops-the-paleocene-creed-page-10/#comments Sat, 10 Dec 2011 05:00:49 +0000 Thompkins http://giantspacelizard.com/?p=207

[[Archbishop Triceratops stands on a pile of broken killer robots.]] Luthor: You ecumenifools! There are more where those came fro… Archbishop [...]]]>

[[Archbishop Triceratops stands on a pile of broken killer robots.]]

Luthor: You ecumenifools! There are more where those came fro…

Archbishop Triceratops: Ecce, stolide…Raptor Iesu.

[[Luthor looks at Archbishop Triceratops' picture of the feathered Raptor Jesus.]]

Luthor: NO! NOOOOOOOOO!

[[Luthor flies away on a jetpack.]]

Urban IX: Thanks dawg. You saved our primate behinds.

[[Archbishop Triceratops is producing a paddle from his robe.]]

Archbishop Triceratops: Id elit. Nunc tempus vobis ad solvendum poenitentiam.

THE END?!?!?

]]> http://giantspacelizard.com/2011/12/10/archbishop-triceratops-the-paleocene-creed-page-10/feed/ Late or no comic this week http://giantspacelizard.com/2011/12/01/late-or-no-comic-this-week/ http://giantspacelizard.com/2011/12/01/late-or-no-comic-this-week/#comments Thu, 01 Dec 2011 13:51:40 +0000 Thompkins http://giantspacelizard.com/?p=206 The comic this week will either post late on Saturday, or won’t post at all.  I am having health trouble and I’m very busy at work.  Despite this I’ve been spending most of my free hours (and depriving myself of sleep as well) to work on the comic.  However it’s coming along much more slowly than I would like.  Therefore rather than destroy my health for the (zero?) people who check this site regularly on Saturday, I will put off the comic to this weekend.  If I get it done on Saturday it will post the same day (December 3rd), otherwise I will hold off posting it until next week (December 10th).

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[[Urban IX and the surviving Cardinal look distraught, their robes slashed, as the killer robots converge upon them.]] Luthor: Now I [...]]]>

[[Urban IX and the surviving Cardinal look distraught, their robes slashed, as the killer robots converge upon them.]]

Luthor: Now I see why the dogma forbade killer robots! They seem to be a weakness of yours!

[[Urban IX raises his ear at a sound in the distance.]]

Sound effects: RUMBLE RUMBLE RUMBLE

[[Archbishop Triceratops tramples the killer robots.]]

]]> http://giantspacelizard.com/2011/11/26/archbishop-triceratops-the-paleocene-creed-page-09/feed/ Archbishop Triceratops - The Paleocene Creed - Page 08 http://giantspacelizard.com/2011/11/19/archbishop-triceratops-the-paleocene-creed-page-08/ http://giantspacelizard.com/2011/11/19/archbishop-triceratops-the-paleocene-creed-page-08/#comments Sat, 19 Nov 2011 05:00:30 +0000 Thompkins http://giantspacelizard.com/?p=204

[[Archbishop Triceratops rubs his eyes and look at the humans.]] Archbishop Triceratops: Quid est hoc? Mures, qui ambulant in clunibus? Higgins: [...]]]>

[[Archbishop Triceratops rubs his eyes and look at the humans.]]

Archbishop Triceratops: Quid est hoc? Mures, qui ambulant in clunibus?

Higgins: My superior archbishop! It is such an honor! I must wash your feet!

[[Higgins kneels and uses his robe to wash Archbishop Triceratops' foot.]]

Archbishop Triceratops: Formalismus tempore periculum? Sed certe te catholico.

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[[Higgins takes his cross necklace and turns it upside-down, pressing it into a same-sized opening on the cryogenic tube.]] Higgins: Ph’nglui [...]]]>

[[Higgins takes his cross necklace and turns it upside-down, pressing it into a same-sized opening on the cryogenic tube.]]

Higgins: Ph’nglui mglw’nafh Pétros Roma wgah’nagl fhtagn

[[The cave shakes, knocking over the humans. Billows of smoke shoot out of the tube and Archbishop Triceratops falls forward onto his two front legs.]]

Sound effects: THUD!!!

]]> http://giantspacelizard.com/2011/11/12/archbishop-triceratops-the-paleocene-creed-page-07/feed/ Archbishop Triceratops - The Paleocene Creed - Page 06 http://giantspacelizard.com/2011/11/05/archbishop-triceratops-the-paleocene-creed-page-06/ http://giantspacelizard.com/2011/11/05/archbishop-triceratops-the-paleocene-creed-page-06/#comments Sat, 05 Nov 2011 05:00:40 +0000 Thompkins http://giantspacelizard.com/?p=202

[[A large cryogenic tube holding Archbishop Triceratops is embedded in the cave wall. The Cardinal of Molossia looks shocked.]] Cardinal [...]]]>

[[A large cryogenic tube holding Archbishop Triceratops is embedded in the cave wall. The Cardinal of Molossia looks shocked.]]

Cardinal of Molossia: That’s…that’s…a prehistoric Archbishop!

Higgins: Yes! The Oppenheimers at the research labs suggested they existed millions of years ago, but until 1965 we never thought one had survived. But there’s no time to waste!

]]> http://giantspacelizard.com/2011/11/05/archbishop-triceratops-the-paleocene-creed-page-06/feed/ Archbishop Triceratops - The Paleocene Creed - Page 05 http://giantspacelizard.com/2011/10/29/archbishop-triceratops-the-paleocene-creed-page-05/ http://giantspacelizard.com/2011/10/29/archbishop-triceratops-the-paleocene-creed-page-05/#comments Sat, 29 Oct 2011 05:00:56 +0000 Thompkins http://giantspacelizard.com/?p=201

[[The cardinal of Molossia, out of breath, is at Archbishop Higgins' desk. Higgins is older.]] Higgins: For trinity’s sake man, [...]]]>

[[The cardinal of Molossia, out of breath, is at Archbishop Higgins' desk. Higgins is older.]]

Higgins: For trinity’s sake man, what’s the matter?

Cardinal of Molossia: Urbanine…Martin Luthor…killer robots…

Higgins: Make sense, man!

Cardinal of Molossia: The pope issued general order #6!

[[Higgins looks shocked.]]

Higgins: Do you know what this means? No, of course not. Come with me.

[[Scene change to a cave underground. The Cardinal of Molossia follows Higgins, both of them holding torches.]]

Higgins: We didn’t know about these chambers until Vatican 2 declassified all those records. It was a simpler time, we were totally unprepared for what we found…

]]> http://giantspacelizard.com/2011/10/29/archbishop-triceratops-the-paleocene-creed-page-05/feed/ Archbishop Triceratops - The Paleocene Creed - Page 04 http://giantspacelizard.com/2011/10/22/archbishop-triceratops-the-paleocene-creed-page-04/ http://giantspacelizard.com/2011/10/22/archbishop-triceratops-the-paleocene-creed-page-04/#comments Sat, 22 Oct 2011 05:00:47 +0000 Thompkins http://giantspacelizard.com/?p=200

[[Killer robots appear and the crowd runs. The pope and cardinals stand heroically defiant.]] Urban IX: Cardinal of Molossia, cheese [...]]]>

[[Killer robots appear and the crowd runs. The pope and cardinals stand heroically defiant.]]

Urban IX: Cardinal of Molossia, cheese it to the Vatican. Holler at Archbishop Higgins to activate general order #6.

Cardinal of Molossia: But Urbanine, your life is in danger!

Urban IX: You think this old pope is all used up?

[[Urban IX takes off the hat and produces a crossbow. The other cardinals produce melee weapons.]]

Urban IX: Now, go, GO!

[[Cardinal of Molossia rushes off.]]

]]> http://giantspacelizard.com/2011/10/22/archbishop-triceratops-the-paleocene-creed-page-04/feed/ Archbishop Triceratops - The Paleocene Creed - Page 03 http://giantspacelizard.com/2011/10/15/archbishop-triceratops-the-paleocene-creed-page-03/ http://giantspacelizard.com/2011/10/15/archbishop-triceratops-the-paleocene-creed-page-03/#comments Sat, 15 Oct 2011 05:00:28 +0000 Thompkins http://giantspacelizard.com/?p=199

[[Luthor is shown shaving his head. He looks outside and sees a small songbird land.]] Narration: But once my head [...]]]>

[[Luthor is shown shaving his head. He looks outside and sees a small songbird land.]]

Narration: But once my head was bare I realized: dinosaurs don’t have feathers, so how could they have evolved into birds? The church accepts evolution, but it conflicts with the scripture! It was then that I decided to turn from your false faith to the slightly different faith of biblical literalism!

[[Back to present time.]]

Urban IX: Why do you have to be such a fool, Sanderson!

Luthor: Don’t call me by that name anymore! In honor of the animal that convinced me of my new faith I decided to change my name to Martin Luthor!

[[The pope, cardinals and crowd look confused. Luthor is exhasperated.]]

Luthor: You know, like the bird, a martin?

[[Still confused.]]

Cardinal: You mean like how we’re cardinals?

Luthor: No, no, because, ugh, just forget it! Protesbots, attack.

]]> http://giantspacelizard.com/2011/10/15/archbishop-triceratops-the-paleocene-creed-page-03/feed/ Archbishop Triceratops - The Paleocene Creed - Page 02 http://giantspacelizard.com/2011/10/08/archbishop-triceratops-the-paleocene-creed-page-02/ http://giantspacelizard.com/2011/10/08/archbishop-triceratops-the-paleocene-creed-page-02/#comments Sat, 08 Oct 2011 05:00:55 +0000 Thompkins http://giantspacelizard.com/?p=198

Urban IX: What in the sam trinity are you? Mysterious Person: Not surprising you don’t know me, your hopelessness. [[Cut to [...]]]>

Urban IX: What in the sam trinity are you?

Mysterious Person: Not surprising you don’t know me, your hopelessness.

[[Cut to flashback of Luthor working with a microscope at a lab bench.]]

Narration: After all, back then I was just Luthor Sanderson, a lowly research assistant at the Center for Advanced Sacrament Research. It was there that I made an unsettling discovery.

[[Luthor is now in an office talking to a cardinal at a desk.]]

Narration: Two equally-sized pieces of communion wafer contained different amounts of Messiahchlorians! But when I tried to explain it to my superiors…

Luthor: Do you realize what this means? It can’t be the substance itself changing, instead it must be instead being infused with…

Luthor’s Superior: Look Sanderson, the Catholic tradition clearly states that…

Luthor: But what if the tradition’s wrong?

Luthor’s superior: Sacrilege! Go and shave your head in shame!

]]> http://giantspacelizard.com/2011/10/08/archbishop-triceratops-the-paleocene-creed-page-02/feed/ Archbishop Triceratops - The Paleocene Creed - Page 01 http://giantspacelizard.com/2011/10/01/archbishop-triceratops-the-paleocene-creed-page-01/ http://giantspacelizard.com/2011/10/01/archbishop-triceratops-the-paleocene-creed-page-01/#comments Sat, 01 Oct 2011 05:00:23 +0000 Thompkins http://giantspacelizard.com/?p=197

Narration: It has been a normal day for Pope Urban IX. He now presides over the opening of a Vatican [...]]]>

Narration: It has been a normal day for Pope Urban IX. He now presides over the opening of a Vatican City hair boutique

[[Pope Urban IX is standing in front of a building labeled “Super Clips” wearing the full pope hat and about to cut the red ribbon in front of the door with a large novelty scissors. He is surrounded by two buff cardinals. Camera flashes go off and he is waving.]]

Urban IX: It is my great pleasure to sanctify this storefront in the name of the father, the…

Voice from above: STOP RIGHT THERE!

[[Urban IX and the bishops look up in shock, standing on the roof of the Vatican City Movie Rental is a mysterious person.]]

Mysterious person: Greetings, Vaticlods! Up for a little Sunday School?

]]> http://giantspacelizard.com/2011/10/01/archbishop-triceratops-the-paleocene-creed-page-01/feed/ Archbishop Triceratops - The Paleocene Creed - Cover http://giantspacelizard.com/2011/09/30/archbishop-triceratops-the-paleocene-creed-cover/ http://giantspacelizard.com/2011/09/30/archbishop-triceratops-the-paleocene-creed-cover/#comments Fri, 30 Sep 2011 05:00:24 +0000 Thompkins http://giantspacelizard.com/?p=196

Title: ARCHBISHOP TRICERATOPS [[Stained glass window of a Triceratops in an Archbishop's robe and hat, holding a cross and a scepter.]] Title: [...]]]>

Title: ARCHBISHOP TRICERATOPS

[[Stained glass window of a Triceratops in an Archbishop's robe and hat, holding a cross and a scepter.]]

Title: NEW TESTAMENT BOOK ONE

Title: The Paleocene Creed

Title: by Thompkins

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